The other day I read that many women experience neck, shoulder, and back pain due to ill fitting bras.  The recommendation was to go to a department store professional or bra fitter to get fitted with your proper size. 

I pondered on this for quite a while.  I can understand how some women could suffer pain from the weight that constantly tugs on the neck, shoulders, and back.  What I’m curious about is what qualifies someone to be a professional bra fitter?  Is there a course or class that one takes to be certified to advise other women on which product to choose?   And what do these folks call themselves?  What’s their official title?  Hooter Tutors?

It seems all too personal to me to have assistance in selecting appropriate undergarments.  I always thought selecting a bra was about pretty colors, price, and lifting and separating.  I guess I have been living under a rock, because I wasn’t aware that bra shopping had gotten to be such an art form.  I was ignorant that there is a list of do’s and don’ts and rights and wrongs, when it comes to boulder holders. 

The North American Spine Society and Maidenform urge that you get properly fitted by a bra professional.  Apparently there are guidelines that should dictate our choices.  Evidently you can view the guidelines on the Maidenform web site.  The article also mentioned that you should replace all of your bras every year, because they lose their ability to support after typical wash and wear.  Cha-ching! $$$$

Where is our modesty, I say?  Where is our self-respect, I declare?  Where is my mommy, I cry!  Having to shop for one of those things is humiliating enough.  I always have one eye open for anyone who might be watching.  How these women go into Victoria Secret and wave those things around for all to see, is beyond me.  Don’t they know that Victoria has no Secrets!!  The very thought of asking for a professional fitting terrifies me!  Isn’t life scary enough without putting oneself through that kind of  torment?

I just can’t go that route.  I’d rather go to the chiropractor for my aching back, shoulders, and neck and hope against hope that I have chosen the proper bra fit for me.  The article said that “a bra should be so comfortable to you that you shouldn’t even feel like you have it on.”  I say blessed be the bras that bind!  I’d rather be ill-fitted than mortified any day.

If you ask me, I say bra-vo to those of you who have the gumption to seek professional assistance, but I just can’t go there.  I think I’ll go hide my red face in another article, something that I can read without any further embarrassment.  Wouldn’t you know it, the next article is about prostate cancer research.  Maybe I’ll move on to another magazine, one that doesn’t speak of any body parts.   

3 thoughts on “Hooter Tutor

  1. It is Monday morning. As I sit here reading the story about dancing, my eyes are wet, I have a smile from ear to ear, and I am filled with emotion. I am at a season in my life where dancing can be the strongest medicine on the market for healing depression, bones, and relationships. Thank you for the dose of medicine I needed today and the rest of my life. I must excuse myself so I can dance to my favorite song with my husband. “Unchained Melody”. Today you gave me the greatest gift. Love Your Sister, 🙂

  2. Hooter Tutor for a Boulder holder. . .Girl, try having the OPPOSITE problem. . .needing a hooter tutor for the lack of hooters–finding just the right amount of padding is just about impossible! I think online shopping may be the way to go to avoid humiliation for me!

  3. hahaha…Hooter Tutor – stepping inside Victoria Secret after finding a lost 5 year old $100 gift certificate was so scary. I finally took a deep breath and approached this cute young thang with the perky’s, who could be my granddaughter, and asked her about bras. She pondered and gave me a handfull and showed me the dressing room…she didn’t offer to enter or I’d have had to ushered her out in a hurry! Well, much to my surprise, I bought one and liked it so much went back and got another one with balance of that prized lost gc! But I’m with you – I’d be mortified to have a what did you call them “bra fitter,” go figure! Guess who-pal from WWC

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